go to sleep

here it is, fucking 230 in the morning and i cant sleep... again. i have never been able to sleep well though i am particularly bad lately, so now i find myself lying in bed once again wishing for even a fitful sleep. not going to happen. i should just stay up as i have to leave for work in three hours, so i will sit here blogging so i dont have to worry about waking anyone up. (maybe i should make friends with some europeans so i can talk to them during this time?).

eh, well it gives me time to blog. tonight is the first night it has been cold in a long while, and i am freezing because the boy scout has all of the blankets. i would wake him up and take them but he has to wake up in an hour, although then i would have someone to talk to...

i cant wake him up though im feeling guilty because i keep dreaming of Bat boy with Domenicks voice, or Batboy as Batman or just batboy or just Domenick though i dont know what he looks like really. which is a bad thing. (Domenick is lindseys obsession, although she gave him to me yesterday) yeah right like lindsey would ever really give me domenick. if she were to ever wake up one day and discover that me and Domenick had a thing going on she would go ballistic. (although i havent been in a good catfight in a while, and Domenick has a reallly sexy voice ... i mean really sexy hmmmm....) i like explosive situations, but they have caused me alot of pain before so i will sit here alone in my little corner of the world (and of the bed) and just allow myself to get swept up in thoughts that will never happen.

maybe i should invent a sleep club for insomniacs. they have all sorts of clubs i will invent a sleep club. it will be a giant room sized bed with hundreds of pillows and down comforters egyptian cotton sheets and mmmmm sounds comfy already.... probably wouldnt work though to tell you the truth because lots of people can only sleep naked and it would probably turn into a sex club... although that can make you sleep too.

i need to get my mind out of the gutter though... it is in there all to often. a blog is supposed to be your thoughts on the web so everyone can see but i think i will keep them in my head. maybe i will make a new anonymous blog so i can speak my mind completely... although any one who knows me well will know its me especially when the blogger turns out to be named nikki or lola or anja or any of my other "alter egos"... maybe i will just clean up my thoughts so i can put them all on here without turning hot pink at the idea of anyone reading it. im signing off for now. still cant sleep but i can always read and dream of sleeping. ttfn