Devine Feline

I would swallow my pride,
I would choke on the rinds,
but the lack thereof
would leave me empty inside.
I would swallow my doubt,
turn it inside out,
find nothing but faith
in nothing.
I want to put my tender
heart in a blender,
watch it spin around
to a beautiful oblivion.
Rendezvous
then I'm through with you.
I burn burn
like a wicker cabinet,
chalk white
and oh so frail.
I see our time
has gotten stale.
The tick tock
of the clock is painful,
so sane and logical.
I want to tear it
off the wall.
I hear words
and clips and phrases.
I think sick
like ginger ale.
My stomach turns
and I exhale.
So Cal is where
my mind states,
but it's not my
state of mind.
I'm not as
ugly sad as you.
Or am I origami?
Folded up and
just pretend.
Demented as
the motives in your head.
I alone
am the one you don't
know you need.
Take heed.
Feed your ego.
Make me blind
when your eyes close.
Sink when you get close,
tie me to the bedpost.
I alone
am the one you don't
know you need.
You don't know
you need me.
Make me blind
when your eyes close.
Tie me to the bedpost!
Eve 6 Inside Out

so apparently i purr when i sleep. i didnt know this until last night when i fell asleep watching a movie and i woke up to Mario and Lorenzo staring down at me. i was creeped out by the fact that they were staring at me sleeping because they thought it was adorable and by the fact that i purr. niether of these things are remotely normal. i think i was dying and they didnt bother to wake me up because they thought i was more amusing than the movie... but i woke up this morning still creeped out, having two very large men watch over you as you sleep is very discomforting.

soo.... i had something interesting to say and now i have forgotten it.......... so i have the most random shit in my back seat. i have a toaster oven, signs for summer camp. factility usage agreements. a collection of kitchen supplies for my new apartment donated by my mother. unfinshed taxes (kinda need to get on those) three pairs of black heels (all very different even if he doesnt agree), four red lipsticks, one pink lipstick, a bottle of lotion, two pairs of tennies, three YMCA shirts, payment envelopes, meeting notes, harry potter 2-6 (three copies of 5) purple eyeliner, back pack, bio book, a wallet with an angry cat, plastic catapillar, a painting, perfume, underwear, pillow case, pair of jeans, socks, Nintendo DS, Scene It, Fact or Crap.... but my trunk is clean and so is my front seat (except for cd cases and a phone charger) and i think i should stop living out of my car and clean it before the guys have to get in there to install my new system.

i still dont remember what i was going to say... damn.

oh yeah theres also mail and a su do ku book.